Every girl had her shining moment when she was little. The moment when she first learned how to bike on two wheels without help, the moment she got the main part in a school play, the moment she was recognized as best at art, and other shining moments that boosted her self-esteem. However, somewhere down the road, “womanhood” met “insecurity” and that’s when low self-esteem crept in. There are signs of low self-esteem. What are they and how to deal with them?
You keep your thoughts to yourself
That inner battle going through your mind; should you speak up in your meeting with your boss or keep silent because your co-workers can handle it better than you? Part of having low self-esteem is thinking that people are better than you, which makes you not contribute and speak your mind. Some people go through the fear of being rejected for telling their thoughts and opinions, so they keep their mouths shut, their thoughts to themselves, and their self-esteem low.
How to handle it
When you know that you’re about to have conversations with other people, be yourself and don’t think too much. Most of the time, by thinking too much, you forget to be in the actual moment of conversation, and you’re left with a blank stare. Speak up your mind right away especially if you know that you have a lot of input, sometimes you get it more accurate than everyone else, they just happen to say whatever comes into their minds right away. Don’t allow that to happen again.
You are conscious of what other people say about you
Besides being a people-pleaser, you care too much about what people say about you that you try to put up a front to make them like you more. It’s not bad to make other people like you, but if you’re trying too hard, and it becomes a lifestyle, then your self-esteem is doomed to below. Now think of a social climber, as much as you can see a very outgoing and adventurous facade, deep inside she has low self-esteem.
How to handle it
You already know this, but just “stop assuming”. As far as you are concerned, people don’t care too much about you, so don’t care about them?
You like comparing yourself with others
She’s prettier, smarter, taller, sexier, whiter, etc. You can’t get enough of comparing yourself with other people. The most evident sign of having low self-esteem is this. Enough said!
How to handle it
The best way to handle this is to see the good in yourself and stop comparing yourself with others. Sure, sometimes it’s okay to have healthy competitions for self-improvement, but don’t make comparing a habit. Do not compare somebody’s highlights with your behind-the-scenes. Every one of us goes through life differently, so it’s not fair for yourself to always be on top of everyone else. The next time you find yourself comparing, go through the things you have and the steps to the goals you are about to achieve.
You say “sorry” too much
A lot of women don’t realize it yet, but saying “sorry” too much is also a sign of having low self-esteem. It’s the little things you are “sorry” about that make you doubt the things you do and say. For instance, having to say “sorry” when someone bumps into you when you don’t have a pen when someone asks for it or when you don’t know that answer to a random question.
How to handle it
Reserve your sorry’s for mistakes and not for things which don’t really need your sorry’s. Recognize the difference between uttering “sorry” repeatedly versus a real and sincere apology.
